Waiting

     Tonight I am reminded of one of my favorite descriptive phrases about midwifery. "A good midwife knows when to sit on her hands and when to use them." I seem to sit on my hands a lot. Waiting for labor to begin naturally, waiting for a mama to dilate in her own time, allowing a woman to rest as long as she needs to, believing that she really can do it, having faith that the baby will fit through, loving a sleepless night, hoping that the contractions will get stronger, giving a mama permission to cry, supporting her as she screams, bellows and crawls  to bring the baby down. I know when to use my hands as well, when to break the water, when to stretch the perineum, when to ventilate the baby and when to give a pep talk that just may be the difference between a transport and a home birth. I love my work. I feel so blessed to be invited to a birth. I think a lot about who will attend me when I give birth. It is not an easy decision, I do not take it lightly, and I know my clients are bestowing a great honor upon me when they ask me to be their midwife. I do not take it lightly. 

     As a doula in the hospital I recently had 2 clients who had cesareans, one due to a posterior baby and one due to "deep transverse arrest". This is basically when the baby's head is turned looking hard right or left, whereas the head is ideally looking back toward mama's tail bone. I am so proud of both mother's. They both worked so hard and persevered. They were both incredibly disappointed at the loss of a vaginal birth, but the healing will be easier knowing they can look into their baby's eyes with joy and love. A current client just recently was telling me about her vaginal birth with a posterior baby and she said she had to "fight for my birth". The entire staff wanted to give her a section but she persevered, worked harder and gave birth vaginally. It was traumatic. There was an implication in her story that if women would just work harder, push harder, demand louder and more fervently then they could give birth vaginally, when everyone else doubts them. Is this true? Should we have to "fight for our birth"? Or should we just birth at home...where we don't have to fight? Or is it just sometimes the case that it is beyond the power of the woman, and left to some natural forces that we can't explain or fully understand. For now, I will just continue to wait. 

Twins!!!

Well, I have to document this amazing birth and this seemed like the best place to do it. On Christmas Day 2008 I attended my first Twin-Homebirth. It was a joyous birth, a boy and a girl, both perfect as can be. The girl arrived almost an hour after the boy. I am so grateful to the family for allowing me to be a part of this special birth. I am so proud of them for their dedication to homebirth and their unshakable belief that birth is normal and natural! I have chosen to keep this family's identity unkown to protect their privacy. Thanks to all who supported this birth! Here I am with the little ones at about 6 weeks. What an incredible Christmas gift. This was the closest I have felt in a long time to the true meaning of Christmas. New life, new experience, great faith in the miracle of life and great faith in the strength and ability of woman.

Remember Sabrina?

Maybe you remember this beautiful mama? I had just returned to CO from Bali last Spring and took a picture of Sabrina and her daughter Natalie at a prenatal visit. She was one of the women I was able to return home to. I attended the births of all 3 of her children! What an honor. And here is little Liam making his entrance into the world. What a joyous birth. I love this picture because it really captures how alert and capable birthing women are. She birthed on hands and knees and as I caught the baby I passed him through her legs and into her arms, she grabbed him, sat up and just gave this big, beautiful smile. She was overjoyed. Happy Birthday Liam!!!

What a Belly!

Isn't this the most gorgeous belly you have ever seen? This photo was taken just hours before "pink slide" came sliding into the world, sunny side up! I had the honor of attending the birth of Lucia as Mama Lara's doula. Big sister Lilly took immediate possession of her new baby:) Way to go Lara!

A Midwife and her Family

I would like to introduce Hope Coulter and her husband Tate, their daughter Ava and their new little guy Ransom. He isn't so new anymore, I believe he is turning 1 year this month. Hope is a homebirth midwife...all of her babies born at home!







Here is another CO family birth story from mama Amy. I had the honor of having Amy and Bruce in my childbirth ed class and was hoping to be able to attend their birth, however I was in Bali around her due date and couldn't be there. Here is her story...
Hello familia lobo, and Rebecca (I'm doubling up this
email),


Indeed Brucie and I are thrilled! Little Sylvia is so
content and beautiful. We do a lot of staring at our
little package that we waited 9 months for. The birth
was really quite special. Bill's assistant Marlene was
out of town for a week and I really hoped to wait til
she returned (4 days before our due date), but had a
feeling it would happen before. So I gave dear JoJo
the heads up and asked her to be here if I went into
labor before Sunday. I went into early labor on
Thursday night while cooking dinner, just crampy but
started noticing some intervals. They woke me about
every 10 minutes that night, but just enough to make
me squirm a bit. Bill was in GJ Friday doing
prenatals, but stayed in close contact, and planned an
early afternoon return to Ridgway, his supplies
packed. He gave the heads up to Hope, a midwife that
lives just a block from us. Bruce and Julie were here
with me, and started timing the seismic activity
around 1:30pm noticing things had changed a bit. I was
in more of the focus mode and needing to breath
through the contractions, I imagined this could
continue through the day and night. Around 4:30 I sat
down for a few contractions in a chair and felt a
distinct engagement of the head. I beckoned them to
call Hope and she was over in 15 minutes. She checked
the baby's heart rate and then checked me. I was 8-9
cm dilated and close to transition. Fyew! What nice
news. Bill was due to arrive in 15 mins. so I got in
the tub. What sweet relief that was. Bill showed up
shortly after, entering with a halo of white light
around him. As I'm sure you can relate to that
feeling. JoJo came down from Tride in a snow storm and
got here around 5:30. I was in the tub from about 4:30
until her birth at 7:25pm. An hour of pushing, 3 times
harder than I thought I was capable of, and out she
came, big ol' cone head, shoulders were tougher than I
imagined, but I was ready to have her out! Gave
another mighty push, 8 lbs, 5 oz! and up she looked at
us. Of course we didnt know boy or girl for about 5
mins. b/c the cord was short and I was done. I needed
to collect myself, and then behold, a little girl!!!!
It was the most beautiful event of our lives! We have
some beautiful photos Julie took, and as soon as we
figure out how to post a file to the web, you'll be
certain to receive it. So nice to share with friends
like you, can't wait for you to meet her.
Lots of love, Amy, Bruce and Sylvia

More Babies

I have to include some of the babies that were born to my Childbirth Education students as well. Here is darling Lila daughter or Jen and Eric. I have realized that part of my calling is to be a teacher. I love educating women about birth and the options that they have. My hope is that all women will be active participants in their birth and that a woman never leaves the hospital feeling that things just "happened" to them or that they got caught up in the cascade effect...that spiral of interventions that so often sweeps women away! Little Lila cam a little early...but all was well. I think mama Jen is pregnant with #2!
Here is sweet Anthem. She was a homebirth baby in Telluride. I believe her birth story, written by her mama, was one of the first posts I ever made. Look back to old posts to catch up.

Anthem! Daughter of Melanie and Nick Kotze

More babies